Kairos of Rape Culture

In class today we discussed the kairos of rape and the kairos against rape.

Kairos for rape can be defined as the perfect storm that takes place in most rape scenarios. More often than not alcohol, peer pressure, and a certain stereotype of location (i.e. bar, frat, etc.) are involved. Hyper-masculinity is probably the leading cause of rape, which corresponds with peer-pressure. Many hyper-masculine men want to prove their masculinity to other men, and in end fall into the peer pressure of raping a woman. Attitude by both parties also takes a huge toll on a rape case. Women (or any gendered target for that matter) are often times naïve with no sense of what might happen. For example, a woman may be at a bar with her friends, flirting and drinking with a man, and letting her guard down is a kairos of rape. It shouldn't have to be that women need to walk around paranoid, but they shouldn't walk around completely unaware of the situation either. Society has done the big job of creating a kairos FOR rape so how do create a kairos AGAINST rape?

Education is vitally important in preventing rape. Oftentimes people learn about it one time when they're a teenager, and then never take the time to become educated again. In order to have a successful education system to stop, or at least minimize, rape there needs to be classes over time, across all genders, and not just on college campuses. People tend to shut off when talking about rape, violence, or even just sex. In order for people to have a willingness to become educated, everyone most be willing to be open about it.

Another thing that needs to change in order to create a kairos against rape is the knowledge of language. Society needs to be absolutely explicit about what rape is. A lot of offenders will say, "oh I didn't rape her..." but when asked explicitly what they did it is the definition of rape. It's important to educate everyone of the EXACT difference between consensual sex, and rape or sexual assault. It's about education on the entire spectrum of rape. The lack of education definitely plays a huge role in rape culture.

Paper 1

Rape Culture in the Media

College should be a place to go to have fun, figure out what career to pursue, and learn about what life is like away from home. For the most part college is just that, but what is often brushed aside is the trouble young-adults get themselves into. It is inevitable that when a bunch of eighteen year olds leave home, they are going to push the limits; they’ll drink, party, and experiment because they think they’re invincible. In this, rape is going to occur. It is important that it is properly handled. Rape is not often reported and when it is it is poorly handled by the media; which escalates the failure-rate of reported rapes.

University of Virginia was on the hot seat after news of an on-campus gang rape went viral. Jackie, a young freshman, was targeted by multiple brothers of the Phi Kappa Psi fraternity. The young freshman was at her first frat party. Although she wasn’t much of a drinker, she wanted to fit in and experience the Greek scene. Her date invited her upstairs, and in the young girls naivety she went. She was led up the stairs into a dark room where she realized they weren’t alone. Allegedly there were nine men in the dark room, and seven of them raped and abused her for the next three hours.

Rolling Stone published an article about the horrific events at UVA, explaining the story and the lack of action taken by the university. However, Rolling Stone made an error that is so commonly made in the media; they only got one side of the story. Rolling Stone re-published the article to their website with a disclaimer at the beginning:

“We published the article with the firm belief that it was accurate. Given all of these reports, however, we have come to the conclusion that we were mistaken in honoring Jackie's request to not contact the alleged assaulters to get their account. In trying to be sensitive to the unfair shame and humiliation many women feel after a sexual assault, we made a judgment – the kind of judgment reporters and editors make every day”

            This isn’t to undermine the things Jackie endured, but it is a prime example of the media giving under-researched information. Rape isn’t often reported, but when it is too many people get caught up in merely a portion of the details. Whether the half that gets the attention is from the victim or the alleged offender doesn’t matter, the news will never be complete without both accounts. Just as an offender can lie about not raping someone, a victim can over dramatize the situation.

            Another instance that went viral was the Columbia case in which the accuser carried her nearly fifty pound mattress around campus to represent carrying the burden of being raped. The student, Emma Sulkowicz, claims Paul Nungesser violently raped her and then left without a word. The two had been friends for some time prior to this. The media jumped on this case because of Sulkowicz’s bold gesture.

            Nungesser was taken aback by this accusation. His world was turned upside down, and he claims he didn’t understand why. The media focused on the girl’s side of the story making Nungesser look unquestionably guilty. Soon after Sulkowicz accused him of rape, two more complaints came in. Nungesser was speechless. He had to do something to stop his world from being torn apart, so he chose to tell his side of the story.

            Nungesser and Sulkowicz had been friends for some time. It began completely platonic until one night they were hanging out in his dorm and they had sex. After they slept together, they discussed it and came to the conclusion that they didn’t want to ruin their friendship. This cycle happened a few more times until eventually Sulkowicz claimed he raped her. She claimed it started out consensual until he became too aggressive, forced her to do things she didn’t want to, and then left without a word. He states it was completely consensual and unaggressive, and he didn’t leave until the next morning. Sulkowicz reported Nungesser to the school and when they didn’t respond properly she began carrying her mattress around school. The incident allegedly happened August 27, 2012. What Sulkowicz left out in her accusation was the emails they had exchanged prior to and after the incident:

“Sulkowicz (Thursday, 16 August 2012 9 days prior to alleged rape): Dude, if I have one piece of advice it’s to just dive in and not think about who you’re with because it’s really wonderful and you’re obviously the best.”

“Nungesser (Wednesday, 3 October 2012 after the alleged rape): Oh hi. Happy Born day! You better be celebrating muchos, no? also: donde estas tu i mi viva? See I’m so desperate without you, I even try to speak Spanish. Anywho: merry happy days!”

“Sulkowicz (Wednesday, 3 October 12 after the alleged rape): I love you Paul.”

            The media was under the impression that the girl’s account was accurate, but after Nungesser told his side of the story, many came to the conclusion that it was a false accusation. This is just another illustration of how absolutely imperative having both sides of the story are to drawing a conclusion. The general public, media included, get so caught up in the emotional aspect of a story that they forget to fact-check. There’s no way of knowing exactly what occurred that night between Sulkowics and Nungesser, but it’s safe to say neither of their sides of the story are one-hundred percent accurate and the conclusion should stem from a middle-ground.

            A way of finding a middle ground in heavy situations such as rape is using stasis theory. Stasis theory is consisted of four questions: 1) conjecture, 2) definition, 3) quality, and 4) policy. First, within the Columbia case is there an act to be considered? Absolutely, when a woman says she has been raped it should never be brushed under the rug. It should be taken seriously each time. Second, how can the act be defined? Within this case, both sides of the story need to be considered in order to define the situation. Too often a case is defined by just the accuser’s perspective. Third, how serious is the act? Within any rape case, the prominence of the situation should be considered of great importance, but too often it is looked down upon and not taken seriously. Lastly, should the act be taken to a formal procedure? Yes, and in a formal procedure both parties should be involved. Stasis theory is about finding a middle ground, and in many rape cases this does not happen.

            Twenty-fifteen is in the age of media. News spreads within minutes, and the top stories surround us daily. The media can be both beneficial and hurtful in cases as controversial as rape. Nowadays it is a publish-then-edit culture, meaning news is published before it is truly fact-checked. This being said, it is absolutely important not to trust everything in the news and on the internet. Rape has been under-recognized for a long period of time, and with the social media era it is now getting more attention. However, this means the victims and offenders are being blasted with accusations, often false, causing more pain for each of them.

            The news-media is not the only form of media having a negative impact on rape-culture. Popular media has played a huge part in desensitizing the world to rape. Rape happens in movies, songs, and TV shows all of the time, and no one does anything about it. For example, in the popular show created for teenage girls, Gossip Girl, there are two incidents of rape in the pilot episode; both are instigated by the same male character. The show goes on and they all remain friends. Popular media is actively dismissing acts of rape.

            A recent movie, Gone Girl, was a huge hit after Gillian Flynn wrote the best-selling novel the film was based from. Amy plays the victim in this movie, when in reality she is the instigator. She rapes a man, kills him, and then states she killed him out of self-defense due to him raping her. This movie shows a “girl who cries rape” and still gets what she wants. It is very clear in this movie that Amy has extreme mental issues, but she still gets away with rape, murder, and ends up back with her husband through manipulation.

             Music is a huge contributor to desensitizing society to rape. “Blurred Lines” by Robin Thicke is a disturbing song that hit number one on the top one-hundred lists. The lyrics are about the blurred line between consensual sex, and rape. His song goes, “I hate these blurred lines, I know you want it, but you’re a good girl.” This song was played at many events, and was constantly on the radio, leaving people all over the country subliminally hearing about rape regularly.

            A song that explicitly states the issue of rape is “Date Rape” by Sublime. The lyrics say, “Shut your mouth, we’re gonna do it my way. Come on baby don’t be afraid, if it wasn’t for date-rape I’d never get laid.” This one is especially concerning, because it is saying it’s okay to date-rape somebody if it’s the only option to get sex for a while.

            It’s not just songs sung by men that are being explicit about rape either. Sarah McLaughlin’s song “Possession” is equally as bad with lyrics saying, “I would be the one to hold you down, kiss you so hard. I’ll take your breath away and after I’d wipe away the tears. Just close your eyes dear.” This song is trying to pass off as romantic, but it is just the opposite and no one thought twice about it.

            The media, news and popular alike, are handling the issue of rape horrendously. In theory, the media should play a huge part in helping the situation, but in the end it’s making it much worse. If the news-media focused on accurately portraying the stories, and keeping the names anonymous maybe things would begin to turn around. Popular-media needs to stop desensitizing the viewers to rape, and instead give it the seriousness it deserves. Movies and television shows could make scenes about rehabilitating the victims as well as the offenders. It shouldn’t be about forgetting and moving forward, it should be about getting the necessary help to overcome the tragedy that occurs. Rape-culture is escalating, and the media needs to use its influence to help the situation, rather than hurt it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Bibliography

Erdely, Sabrina. "A Rape on Campus: A Brutal Assault and Struggle for Justice at UVA." Rolling Stone. Rolling Stone, 19 Nov. 2014. Web. 09 Feb. 2015.

Young, Cathy. "Columbia Student: I Didn't Rape Her." The Daily Beast. Newsweek/Daily Beast, 03 Feb. 2015. Web. 09 Feb. 2015.

 

           

           

 

 

Feminist responses

Out of every 100 sexual violence acts only 32 are reported, 7-8 or charged, and only 2 are convicted. This is an extremely sad reality and it's gradually become this way because of the way it's handled. In class today we came up with multiple reasons why only 32% of rapes are reported:
- the victim is blamed more often than not.
- heightens embarrassment and vulnerability.
- the stats are known, so people think "why bother?"
- fear of retribution and backlash.
There are so many things going against reporting a rape, that most of the time people just try to deal with it on their own. In my personal opinion all of these things stems from the constant  victim shaming that occurs in situations like these. If instead of blaming people when rapes are reported, maybe if people focused on rehabilitating not only the victim, but the person who committed the crime, things would be different.

Blaming girls for their appearance starts at a young age. In schools, specifically high schools, girls are constantly getting into trouble for the things they choose to wear because apparently they are inviting boys and men to lust after them. It shouldn't be okay to teach vulnerable teenage girls they should dress a certain way in order to not get negative attention from guys. Why aren't schools teaching these boys to respect girls regardless of what they are wearing rather than teaching girls that they're in charge of whether they get attacked or not. Now, obviously dress codes serve other purposes such as teaching students to look more professional for future studies and jobs, but looking too unprofessional or unclassy is never the reason someone gets in trouble for breaking dress code in high school; it's always that they are dressed inappropriately and men are going to get bad ideas from the girls outfit. Starting to teach boys in high school and junior high to respect women regardless of what she is wearing may cut down on college campus rapes, because it is an unavoidable fact that college girls are going to wear skimpy clothes on Greek row. Although girls should dress more appropriately, this shouldn't be the leading verdict in rape cases.

If we started teaching everyone to respect everyone at a young age regardless of outfit, gender, race, class, etc. and focused on rehabilitation rather than blame, the number of rapes may decrease, and the number of rapes being reported would increase.